I TED … a Dr. Seuss Parody


A parody poem

By JTR Franklin



I do not like Obamacare I said.  I already have free government healthcare, said I Ted.


I Ted will stand, preen, and bluster.  I will jabber and blabber in this filibuster.


Dad would make green eggs for Ted in a synch.  I Ted thought himself Sam, but is really the Grinch.


You're a mean one ... Mr. Crinch.

You’re a mean one … Mr. Crinch.



I Ted will tell you that I think and care for you all.  But I’m unable to do so, cause my brain and heart are two sizes too small.


I Ted loves those yummy White Castle burgers.  I Ted will purchase them from those underpaid uninsured fast-food workers.


I Ted tell citizens I only wear suits that are cheap.  However, the Koch brothers bought some expensive clothes for my wife and I to keep.


I Ted thought New Jersey didn’t need aid, even as the flood water rose higher.  I Ted begged for aid in Texas after an explosion of fertilizer.


I Ted question Presedent Obama as a true American citizen.  I Ted Texas Senator am a natural born Canadian.


Please don’t call I Ted a canuck.  I Ted am an all-American crook.


I Ted live well, while most Americans are struggling.  I Ted will call them lazy, while I am paid for doing nothing.


I Ted and republicans cause shutdowns when we complain and pout.  We laugh and ponder why none votes us out.


I don’t want this Obamacare, said Ted.  I don’t mind if no one else has healthcare, said I Ted.

The End











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